Maybe it does matter...

"30 years from now, it won't matter what jeans you wore, how popular you were, what your hair looked like, or what sneakers you wore. What will matter is what you made of your education, and where it took you in life."

Surprisingly as much as it seems that we are just trying to front that the comments and the way you look wouldn't matter to everyone, we do let the little things phase us. It was recently brought to my attnetion that a skirt I wear may be a little too shirt, that the high heels that I walk around in are a little to high and the "cat-eye" like make up that I do is a little disturbing. I never thought that it would phase me as much as it did. Honestly I wanted to wear my shortest skirt and do my make up even better than the last time, and the heels well I'm short and they can get over the fact that I look good. As Erin Brokivich says, "As long as I have 2 asses instead of one, I'll wear whatever I want to" These women, mid 30 and 40 year old females, have decided that making a mockery is what they will do at their weekend jewelry parties. Pretty sad that you have nothing to do but sit around and talk about someone you feel threatened by. I will never understand but for now...F off I will wear what I look good in, and for now that is probably everything you can't wear!

Interesting...

So I saw this on my Yahoo homepage today and thought I'd share it with you guys! Soooo, what do you think, have you found The One yet?!?! haha!! its hilarious but enjoyable to read

The Indications:

So chances are, there is more than one person out there who fits the bill for you. All of them are less than perfect. But if there are no perfect partners, how can you know whether to stay or go? Here are 10 relationship markers to help you know if he or she is The One:

1. When you're together you feel like you've come home.

2. You feel like your partnership was meant to be, as if kissed by destiny.

3. In your communication with each other there is a rapid "knowing" of what each of you means.

4. You have a shared mission in life, perhaps a cause, a career, or the creation of a family life.

5. When you're together the world seems like a better place.

6. Your mood is elevated when you're together. It's not necessarily passion or excitement, although that's there too at times.

7. When you look at him/her you see a part of yourself that's been missing. Perhaps it's her assertiveness or his joy of adventure. But it's something that when added to your life, makes you feel more complete.

8. Being together makes you more hopeful about the future you are creating.

9. You can be more authentic and fully yourself around your partner.

10. Being together makes each of you work harder on overcoming bad habits and becoming more loving people.

Don't worry if you don't feel all 10 of these things when you're with your partner. That's where the imperfection comes in -- either in you or your partner. If you are experiencing six or more of these markers, chances are you are matched well. Over time you can work towards having all of these qualities. Couples who have lasting love find that their relationships get closer and better over time. And that process has been my privilege and good fortune to experience personally -- after a lot of hard work that continues to this day!

Bottom line: your chances of finding The One are better than you think. So go out there and start looking. Love almost always comes in a surprise package that opens up in marvelous and magical ways.

New Me....

I guess for awhile now, I have been doing some major revamping on who I am...And for the most part I think that there have been some positive changes in my life. In the past few months, I have decided to rid my life of the negativity, that I should stand for something before I fall for everything.

Life has been an uphill battle, but at the same time, everything that has happened has only made me who I am today as well as a stronger person. I won't be the person who will sit back and let things slide, because I am stronger than that and learned that lesson too many times.

Too much in life we hold onto the past struggling to make things the way they were because were comfortable in that state of mind, however learning to take on new challenges seems to be exciting. I'm learning that settling is not something that I should ever have to do, because I am worth what I put into myself.

If you always make the choice and feel like it is not the right one, maybe re-evaluation is something that you should take into consideration.

Don't take things for granted, one day it might mistake you for easy.

Today...

As I sit here with tears just starting to well up in my eyes, I have to sit back and realize what am I doing, why on earth am I crying?

Finally after 11 months of going back and forth being taken advantage of and seeing what things really are, I let go. I had to let go and yet I am not looking back, I can't. I have to learn that walking away even running for that matter is the best.

Even though it hurts really bad, I have to do it, and hey you never know as fast as I run, it may just be in a circle, but I have to at least start....

I mean how long can one person go on with a charade of what they really want out of life, as opposed to taking a stand and really just getting what you want.

It's time for me and what I want and I'm not settling for less than that.

Be you

Why does it matter what people think? It is something I have to ask myself and yet sometimes I still let the comments about what people think of me get under my skin. Sometimes it is hard to brush off what is said. Somethings can be truly hurtful. People think that they really know something about you, but deep down we all put up the walls to make sure that our truest feelings are only shown when we feel a little bit of ease with trusting someone. People are sneaky they use things against you, they talk about you when you aren't around...we are all guilty of a little bit of gossip, about the opposite sex, same sex regardless....we talk.

Brush it off your shoulders, the more they talk the famous you are. You are only what you answer too...

life...

So lately, it has been brough to my attention by some close friends of mine that they think I have grown up. I really value that...honestly. It's hard to see the change in yourself at times. Over the past year, things have happened that have made my perspective on life completely change.

There are certain things in life that I believe we may take for granted, and I have realized that it may be hard, but you have to sit back and be thankful. You can't always have what you want in life, and that is the point. You always have to want...because without it what is the point at all.

These past few months even have showed me...that I am lucky, that I have a great life and even though there are small things out there that happen to me, in the big scale of things it is not nearly detrimental compared to others.

I have learned that prayer even through the darkest time is something that I should cherish, because I have faith I know that with God that I can find the light at the end of the tunnel.

Things happen, people change, life has road blocks....

What's love, but a second hand emotion?!

So last night I found myself intertwined in a very interesting conversation, which sparked an intriguing question that has held many theories in the past: What is love? Now after several minutes of organized chaos that went running through my mind of how can one possibly answer this question, I was able to conceive an answer, Love is indescribable. Now wait one minute, how is indescribable an answer. The mere definition to indescribable alone is; not able to describe. So without a description what are we left with but an empty answer, the starting off point of this simple question: What is it?

I believe there are several different variations of love. You can definitely be in love with someone and you can have love for someone and of course I think there are many people who will agree with me on that.

Being in love with someone is something that I have always tried to explain, but yet the words just can’t come out as to what the feelings really are. I have always said being in love with someone is when that person can walk into a room and nothing else matters. They can walk into your life and all of the hurt, the pain and strife that you are going through is taken away when you see that one person. Knowing that, that one person is the one and the right one. They would bend over backwards; walk through fire to be with you. The whole being in love situation also comes with a slight complication that can happen, what if you are in love with someone and they are not in love with you back. They may love you but are they in love with you? It is a very difficult question and sometimes though it may be hard, realizing before it is too late is sometimes better before letting your unreciprocated feelings just left in the dark.

Having love for someone is something that in contrast is hard to see and realize and although there are several similarities to being in love and having love, there is a difference. You care about someone, you would be there for them, and you love them, but are you head over heels in love with them…. Don’t have doubts though, you can have love for someone and with time fall in love with them, but it does take time.

I do believe that you can’t really know what being in love is without ever really experiencing it. I think a lot of people get caught up in the emotion of wanting to be in love they totally throw out the fact that time is of the essence. Although it may seem like something that you may be sure on, and you may think right away that you are in love, it is something that you should definitely not speed through. I mean it is your feelings for goodness sake take care of them wisely. Sure it is something that is easier said than done, but we have to stop, sit back and look around sometimes, take in that quick breath of fresh air. Learning to go with the flow and learning that what you love maybe just something that you really like a lot is something that is a constant battle between your head and your heart. How can we decipher what is going on between them both and make sure we are making a correct decision, only time will tell. We are so quick to run to the finish before stopping to see if this is the track we are supposed to be on.

Love isn’t as simple as a four minute love songs that we set on replay on our ipods, it takes time. There is a course, a road that has not yet been travelled until that time we decide to make a conscious effort with someone. Along the road we learn, we grow with that person and on our own. Things take time, wouldn’t you rather be in love with someone and know who they really are, then be in love with someone for what you think that they are based on only a few minutes or days that you have had with them?

I have wrote on several instances about love… but as I sit back today and wonder, how can I really know how to write love without ever being to the point of being in love? I can make my accusations about what I think it may be and hey I think they are pretty close definitions, but it is my word against every other person out there.

Race is a marathon not a characteristic of a person...

I just wanna know what the fuck is wrong with people and why they think that what they are doing is right, when they are criticizing you for the same thing that they are doing....hello pot calling the kettle black! Get a fucking clue!

After a recent facebook (I know seriously a facebook digg come on how old are we?!)wall post, in which all I said was "Where's your patron? Maybe Blonde Snooki took it" In which I get a comment back (AND I APPOLOGIZE TO ALL WHO READ THIS, BECAUSE THESE ARE NOT MY WORDS AT ALL!!!!) "BITCH...wtf are you talking shit for, i hate people who talk shit, thats some fagot ass shit, you talking shit makes you a fagot"

Are you kidding me!? Please tell me that you just basically commented on what I said by talking shit....ha so does that make you what you are calling "fagot ass shit"
Please grow up... First of all calling someone a "fagot" is not a term that I believe should be said, just like the N word....To me it is a classification of character, it is who someone is, it is deteriminate factor of what makes a person, something that they may not be able to control at all. Granted when it comes to race/characterization/qualities of a person, I quickly will throw out racial asian slurs, I know I'm really bad about it, and at the same time I know that I'm not politically correct at all either. Which I guess is another lessoned learned. But at the same time, it doesn't make someone less "normal" because they have the N word or the F word or any word that can be thrown their direciton to classify them as a person. Maybe my standards for people are higher for than others, just because I value every person as an individual. People can't help what they look like (however they can change it) they can't help what the color of their skin is or their sexual preference is something that may not be the same as yours or ours or anyones, but that doesn't make a person less of a person because they are not the same as you...

L-O-V.....excuse me!?

Love - The word should definitely not be taken lightly....Is it one of those things that you just blurt out and say? NO...and if you do does that mean you really truly mean it and you didn't know how else to say it. Some of us get scared, some of us really don't know what to say. Who really just blurts out, I love you, and not once oh but twice. How can you be sure that you really love someone? I know how you can tell if you have love someone but to tell if you are IN love with someone now that is the question. I know that I love a lot of people in my life, but how will I ever really know if I am in love with that one person? I don't think you can truly love someone until you trust them (thanks Ne-yo for that brillant thought). What basis do we have if we can't trust someone? I know that myself I have huge trust issues, I have love for certain people in my life, but still to this day have a hard time trusting people, even friends. There are certain times that I wonder if one can live a life without falling IN love... And the age old question for everyeone is there one person for everyone out there, we will never know, but I believe. Maybe for those that don't believe will never be able to find that one person, but I believe. I think that everyone has a soulmate besides their best friends that always somehow bring out the best in them. I believe that there is that one person that can bring a smile to one's face and always know how to make things better. We live our lives by the lyrical love songs, that there is a way, and that one will always love you. We wouldn't be able to write such words without such passion of love.

I think that I have been close before to falling in love, and yes it terrifies me and to say the least I am pretty commitment phob, I mean the word relationship litterally gives me chills, however I guess I should probably start growing out of that and maybe start realizing feelings are there for a reason. You can't help how you fell or what you feel for someone. I always said that when you fall in love you know...When that person walks into your life, nothing else matters.

Bored at work...

When does one realize that they are just stupid and foolish?

Are the excuses just excuses or are they real reasons. One can only make excuses for so long, you would think. How many times can you really be pushed to the side. Everyone is an amazing person, well at least the people I hang out with, but with that we have such amazing qualities that make us who we are and define our character. We have to grow to accept and love ourselves before we can even let anyone in to love us as well.

The essence of a male that a woman will never understand:

The essence of a male that a woman will never understand:

No matter how much he loves you, almost 100% of the time he has been given the gift of sight, which means he will look at other females, you may not see it, but it does happen, they may not even be attractive, but they are looking.

As hard as it is sometimes to understand, it is very rare that men actually think. They on most occassions do not, so don't be upset if you're feelings are hurt, remember men mature slower than women, meaning their brain also matures a little bit slower and they tend to process S-l-ower :-) Unless you spell it out for a guy most of the time he doesn't catch on.

The who called who first or who text who first: It doesn't matter as long as you're not the sole person in the conversation! No guy really keeps track...you can text him first or he can text you first there isn't really a score card on the side of his phone where he tallies the number of times you call/txt. As long as it's in moderation...

Don't Let One Bad apple ruin the bunch...

Through many life experiences we are supposed to learn, grow and change for the better. We however sometimes tend to judge and hold back and fear taking a risk that we will never know if it was worth taking. Holding our past against our futures pretending that we are ok instead on the inside all we think about is fear. We are scared, sometimes afraid to admit it, but we are. As a female I know that I am terrified sometimes. Afraid to take a risk, show who I really am and be who I am because of the torturous fear that we are being judged for someone we are not. Now speaking for the females in this day and age we at times feel as though we are being used, only there for the game of fun. Being taken advantage of and to the full extent we feel as though this internal feeling of acceptance is acknowledged as positive attention when in all reality it is just a false sense of happiness. We have become so accustomed to the lack of respect we have lost respect for ourselves, letting these actions be ok. And whose fault does it turn out to be? We quickly judge the male party. We automatically believe that this was there fault that they made us feel that way. However to partially stand up for the ..male population it isn't their entire fault. We, unbeknownst to a lot of individuals were graced with right to choose, the right to have self control and stand up for what we don't want. However some of us don't realize that the negative decisions that we have made are slowly tearing us apart internally. We start to barricade ourselves against the next male that comes in our path that may give us that false sense again, but what is that proving. Holding our own mistakes for blame against a different guy and letting him catch the guilt for our own actions and using those basis for the next male that comes in our path. I, just as many of us know what it is like to be hurt, cheated on, manipulated and used. It is hard to go out meet a few people and not expect that they only see you as that one night thing that will only satisfy their sexual desires. We put ourselves in situations that only lead us to believe that we are different then the last, that we can change him and make him a better guy. We try and hope to believe that we are not that girl. After so many times of such mistreatment and being taken advantage of you would think we'd stand up, but we don't. we fall down again and again, falling for the same thing, we then become so afraid to even try and stand up because it is to hard to get back up after being pushed down so many times. We think we've learned our lessons, but sometimes we only choose to follow in our old steps instead of creating new ones. Following in those that have made the same mistakes and learning from them instead of learning for ourselves. We let the little things in life push us so far down, we don't get up, we let go our structure and being to believe that the pieces won't go back together. Our goal should be to learn from your past so that doesn't shape your future. Let the mistakes shape you to be a stronger person that will grow and learn.

*OLD POST*

Being Single isn't the end of the world....at least until I'm 40

I am going to talk about something more important.... I am going to talk about WHY YOU NEED TO BE SINGLE.
Cause it's the first start, to a fresh relationship.....because it starts with yourself. ___________________________________________________
I for one used to think that I "had" to be in a relationship to be happy.... I didn't know why I thought this... it's just that in High School, if you weren't dating someone, you must be a dork, or something was wrong with you. (maybe you smelled bad or sucked at kissing, maybe both.... LOL kidding) But it's not just High school, that makes you feel this way.... it's the entire Mid-West.
For some strange reason, not known to the common Midwesterner... we all forgot what dating was all about, and more so...what being single was all about.
Being single isn't so much a time to spend playing around with your friends at the bars and clubs....or getting with as many of the opposite sex that you can.....
It should be a time used for 2 things..... two very important things I might add.
1) Self Reflection..... you just got out of a relationship.... you might need to find out who "you are again" and what your goals are in this life... and what you want out of it.
2) Goals for your next "love of your life"...... Sure I am making fun of the "love" part...cause we all know that we have thought we were head over heals for the last person.... well maybe not the last person.... but $10 says you have had one in the past. Though... obviously she / he wasn't right for you.... thus the end of the relationship. So why not take this time to set aside some ideas on qualities you would like the next date to posses. If this date doesn't posses them... then move on to the next date that may....
SO here is the deal.... yes I enjoyed being single....

Because I got to find out who I truly am..... I may not have everything in life figured out... but who cares... I'm 20.... I don't have to have it all figured out. I would like to still make some mistakes, and learn as I go. That's how I learn... trial and error...

So how does this apply to being single..........?????????
Well, first off find yourself..... once you do that, you will have a much easier time finding that person that really makes you happy... .that person that makes you all giddy inside... and you can't sit still... like you got ants in your pants. If you jump into a realationship....while your busy finding yourself... she/he may not think you have it all together... or that you are maybe something your not.... Heck you might be soooo in left field on who you are, you might mistake them for someone you THINK you need to be with.
So I suggest NEVER dating a person... and then settling thinking you "won't find that special person" That is BS... their are 7 billion people on the planet (or something like that) and 49 other states in America chances are you can find someone better then that crazy EX you had... that drives you up the wall...

If you have already settled.... end it now..... cause your wasting both of your time. If you aren't feeling the butterflies in your stomach... then you my friend have missed the boat. So you might as well jump out now... swim to shore... and try for the next one.... Trust me that it's worth it.
I know it's easy to say.... Just wait.... be single... it will be worth it. But for those of you that know what I am talking about.....we can all go back stage and high five each other.
A relationship is supposed to be fun.
Sure it takes work... though it's not a JOB


It should be this simple... and it can be.
You like her
She likes you
You treat her with respect
She treats you with respect
You have fun with each other....
Things progress.
It should not be like hop scotch, where you take 3 steps forward... and 2 steps back...hoping to reach the end of the mat.
So moral of the story.... use your single time wisely....and wait for the butterflies.


"It should be like that thing, that moment, when you kiss someone and everything around becomes hazy and the only thing in focus is you and this person and you realize that that person is the only person that you're supposed to kiss for the rest of your life, and for one moment you get this amazing gift and you want to laugh and you want to cry because you feel so lucky that you found it and so scared that that it will go away all at the same time." - Never Been Kissed

***SORRY THIS IS AN OLD POST :-)***

Todays top 10 topic: Little annoying things that could be avoidable...

#10 Drivers who don't use their blinker but then get mad at you....its a turn signal for a reason!

#9 People that think they need to control things, but really it is out of their control

#8 People who don't take responsibility for their actions...ahem you did it, own up!

#7 The little lies...

#6 slurpping with your mouth when youre eating...do I need to know that you are eating?? You sound like a horse at a trough....

#5 People who call the wrong number but then get mad at you....WTF you called doofus!

#4 When people don't know how to speak correctly and it grammatically shows in THEIR facebook status or texts.

#3 Seat up or seat down boys and girls?????!!!!!!

#2 Lazines...enough said

#1 If you use the last of the toilet paper, at least put a new roll in the vicinity of the toilet!